Homophobia in the Classroom

Teach For America trains its teachers at "Institutes" across the nation. Institutes are "teacher boot-camp" for five weeks, including three weeks of teaching in a summer school classroom. There are different groups of teachers from various areas. I am part of the Greater New Orleans Corps, but at institute I worked and studied with teachers who will teach in the Louisiana Delta, Atlanta, Nashville, Southwest Ohio.

Working with an assigned co-teacher I taught three weeks of 8th grade English Language Arts. There were challenges and hard moments, but there were also moments where I could see students improving and growing.

It was fascinating to see the homophobia that people carry at such a young age. Most of my students were about 13 years old, but they already knew that the way I acted, walked, and talked was "gay". I am going to share the situations of homophobia that I experienced with my 8th grade class, and tell you how I responded.  My responses are far from perfect, and many leave me frustrated, but motivated to continue the work I am doing.

Some of these experiences could be triggering for people, and a lot of LGBTQ slurs are quoted.

"Stop daydreaming at me."
This is the story of a young man who was ultimately expelled from my summer school class. We'll call him Tom. Tom was a smart student who had a lot of trouble in my class. He talked out at inappropriate times, and distracted his classmates from work. After a few days in my class Tom was sent to complete a reflection sheet (a worksheet that asks questions to students about their behavior). He went into the hall with my co-teacher. When my co-teacher asked Tom why he was acting out, he said it was because he would never pay attention to a "Gay Teacher".

The next day, after more acting out, I took Tom outside of our classroom to talk. He filled out another think sheet, and again his answers did not take responsibility for his negative behavior. When I asked him to fill out the reflection sheet again with more responsible answers, he swore at me, and called me a "Fucking Faggot". He was suspended by our principal for one day. 

When Tom returned to class on Monday, he went through all of his consequences in the first 15 minutes of class. Again, I asked Tom to fill out a reflection sheet. I sat by him to make sure he was paying attention and not continuing to distract from the class. Tom was looked up at me and then down at his paper again and again. He did not write anything. As I watched him he said more than three times,

"Stop daydreaming at me."

I didn't know what to do. Tom was distracting the class. I told him we were going to go in the hallway to finish his reflection sheet. He said he would not go anywhere alone with me. In that moment I understood that for whatever unfair and hurtful reason, this child lived in constant fear around me. He thought I was going to do something bad to him.

How do you educate around that?

After several more outbursts directed at me and other teachers, Tom was expelled. I would not have chosen to expel him from class, but I also don't know what I would have done to educate him if he had stayed.

"That's so gay."
Many of my students said "That's so gay" on a regular basis. It was frustrating. I tried to respond every time, but juggling teaching, student behavioral management, and debunking homophobia was challenging.

The first few times this happened, I definitely missed it. When I did address it, I stopped my lesson, and had a very frank "no-nonsense" conversation about why saying "That's so gay" is hurtful, but I don't think it was as effective as it could have been. My 8th grade students, unlike my friends and coworkers from other environments, did not have a long-standing relationship with me that made them feel ashamed about their word choice. This was a toughie.

 "Faggot!"
Good-bye college, and hello real life. At the University of Oregon people usually saved shouting "Faggot" at me from their cars. During my second week of teaching summer school in Atlanta, students felt free to shout it at me from across the cafeteria. I was so shocked that I honestly did not react. I stood near the students who had said it, looking somewhere between sad and angry while they continued to giggle. Later, I pretended that I hadn't heard and asked one of my students what they had call me.

"They called you gay," she said.

"Thank you. Go back to class."

When I asked my Teach For America staff what I should do, I got the answers that I expected, which was disappointing.

"Tell your students the definition of the word 'faggot'. Tell them they are making themselves look silly by using improper vocabulary."

I appreciate the effort in this response, but really that's not what it's about! It's not bad to say the fa-word because it's "incorrect vocabulary". It's bad to use the fa-word because when you do you reduce someone to a single part of their presumed identity and saying that it is bad.

I still don't know the "right way" to respond to situations like this.

"Mr. Gay"
During school breakfast of my second-to-last day of school, I found out that my students referred to me as, "Mr. Gay" when I wasn't around (or when I was, but when they thought I couldn't hear). This is the first situation in which I have been somewhat pleased.
I entered my classroom. And began my lesson as usual. A few minutes into class I turned to a student who I knew was participating in the behavior.
"I hear that you have a name for me when I'm not around. I would like you to share it with the class."
The student felt very embarrassed, and did not respond. I asked another student to "help out" her classmate by sharing the name I was called when I was not around.

"She calls you Mr. Gay"

I then took my class through a conversation about why that was hurtful and not okay. Students did not really understand, and in the end, I tried to show students how language choices can impact their life in the realm of future jobs, or going to school.

This is one of the situations that I feel I dealt with more proactively. It helped that I had time to make a plan in advance, and then make a plan. 

Conclusions
My experience teaching at institute was so different from other teachers. I did not leave feeling sad to see all of my students go. I did not think that being called "faggot" by a thirteen-year-old or "Mr. Gay" by my entire class would be as hurtful as it was.

The one thing I know leaving institute is that homophobia is not over, especially not in our schools, and if we are not working as teachers to counter it, we may as well quit now.